To Give & To Receive
When my friend Cindy invited me to Cuba with her, I couldn’t resist. If you know me, you know Cuba is like home. When she told me she would gather donations before her visit to Cuba, I was excited to participate and provide some of my friends and their friends with items that were inaccessible to them due to inflation in Cuba and/or the U.S. embargo. Though I have been to Cuba probably over 30 times in my life, I never asked folk for donations. Perhaps because I was younger… perhaps because prior to a Cuba trip I would simply rummage around home for items I didn’t use and would offer those to friends and family. At 29, and with Cindy as a role model, my trip to Cuba was the most intentional. Not only was I excited to visit friends who had become like family over the years, as life continues to become more difficult for the Cuban people, I was also happy to bring with me over 50 pounds of medicine, baby clothes, vitamins, spices, and more.
I waited until my layover in Texas to withdraw money from my debit card. As some of you may know, U.S. cards do not hold any value in Cuba. They do not work anywhere, and so we must carry cash with us at all times. To my surprise, every ATM machine I attempted to use in Dalls Fort-Worth International Airport rejected my card. After multiple conversations with my bank, who assured me that my card had sufficient funds, and that I should be able to withdraw cash from any ATM, I was still unable to withdraw cash. I called Cristi, my Cuban mama (and the owner of the airbnb), on whatsapp and explained to her that I might arrive to Cuba with no money. I was distraught. This meant that I would have no way to pay for the taxi, the airbnb, food, to treat my friends to meals— I was just so so sad. Over the phone Cristi said, “Mika, pero que te pasa?! Aqui no tenemos dinero y somos felices! Ven aqui sin dinero, que me importa! Solo quiero que vengas. Ven, mi niña, el dinero es lo de menos,” which basically translates to, “Money is of the least importance! We don’t have money here, and we’re happy. We just want you here. Come!” This only made me cry even more.
In desperation, I asked a man who looked like he worked at the airport (he wore an airline lanyard around his neck) for help. In tears I explained to him my situation. I even showed him my bank account on my phone so that he could see that I actually had sufficient funds. I asked him if I could Zelle him money in exchange for cash. Rightfully so, he was hesitant. We walked over the the ATM, which seemed to work for various people before us, and he attempted to withdraw $150 instead. To his surprise, the machine rejected his card, too. Were we just the two unluckiest people in the airport?! Why did the ATM work for everyone else but for myself and this random man willing to help me?! This man clearly saw the desperation in my face because he then offered me $150 he had in his wallet. I immediately Zelled him. His name was Marcos— I can never forget such a kind gesture. It’s moments like these that really make me believe in the kindness of strangers. The $150 wasn’t enough for much during my week in Cuba, but it was enough for a taxi to and from the airport, a lunch outing with friends, and one dance class.
I’ve always loved Cuba for reasons I have not always been able to clearly express. With my words, I will say, I love who I am when I am in Cuba. I love the people I surround myself with or end up meeting when I am in Cuba. I love the endless conversations that turn into silence as everyone sips their coffee or Havana Club, and smoke their cigarettes or cigar. I love the music and the religion that permeates every corner. I love the sense of community folk build with one another.
I thought I went on this trip to give, and to give some more. With over $300 in cash donations that I used to buy vitamins, protein and other essentials, and bags of clothes, food, and medicine that I received from colleagues at my job, I thought my purpose in this trip was to follow in the footsteps of my mom, who was also a giver. Who always gave, with no hesitation, no expectation, no regret. And I am happy to say that I did. I am happy to have made my friends, and some of their friends happy. And while I couldn’t give more, due to the financial mishap, I am grateful for the love that still surrounded me on this trip. A love so uncanny, inimitable, pure. Cuba does that. I hope my mama is proud (rest in peace <3).
I arrived to Cuba sad, yet with so much to give and so much love to receive, whether I went equipped with cash or not. I left with immense gratitude and with a newfound understanding of what it means to give and to receive. Neither of which require material, or objects.
Thank you for reading <3
Mika
xoxoxo
